I'm A Loser. It's Official.

All right, I am officially a loser. As if there was ever any doubt.
Congratulations to Mr. Huggies, winner of Rebecca's Big Blogger
Contest. The final vote: Sheep on a Unicycle (301), Me (2583),
and Mr. Huggies (4002). I hope he puts the prize of absolutely
nothing to good use.

I could have won, you know. I had 4003 monkeys all set up to
click 4003 mice. I had promised them each a bite of Cheese
Sandwich. Then Cheese Sandwich came to an unfortunate end,
and was replaced by a Sheep on a Unicycle. My monkeys did
not want a bite of sheep. Whenever they thought of sheep, they
started counting, and 1420 monkeys fell asleep, just like in the
Wizard of Oz. I could have voted for myself 1420 times, but
that would have given me carpal tunnel syndrome and I could
not continue to put out such high-quality posts for you all to
enjoy--I mean tolerate--each day. So now I am a loser, and
Mr. Huggies has my nothing.

Thank you Deadpanann, for supporting me in my quest for the
Big Blogger title. I am sorry for stalking you, but it was all part
of the contest. Too bad I didn't have a stalker to run up the vote
for me. Thanks to the rest of you who helped my monkeys
vote. I could not have lost without you.

And now, I would like to share with you some quotes about
competition. I don't know who said them, but I heard them
somewhere.

"Show me a good loser, and I'll show you a loser."
"If a tie is like kissing your sister, then losing is like kissing your
grandma with her teeth out."
"It's not whether you win or lose....but whether I win or lose."
"If at first you don't succeed, find out if there's a prize for the loser."
"Second place is first loser."

OK...well, that didn't cheer me up very much. I need to find some
new motivational quotes. I feel like Charlie Brown. Can someone
please get me a scraggly little Christmas tree? Anybody? Anybody?