Redneck Review

Wednesday, August 31, 2005

This and That

Tin Can Phone
SBC left a message on my phone that they ran a check and everything
was fine. I could hardly hear it through the static. Go figure. Hillbilly
Husband took a phone outside and plugged it in and same old static.
This proves the problem is not inside the house. It is in the phone
line that the good people of SBC ran from a pole by the gravel road
down through the field by our barn, across a stand of trees to the old
Hillbilly Mansion. It is buried in a shallow grave about 2 inches deep
and 400 feet long. I will be calling SBC again tonight if I can make
a connection, or I will go out on the porch with the cell phone, since
it does not get good reception in the house. I must be living in a vortex
of bad phone service. I can blog if I take 45 minutes to get to the
new post screen, and then another 15 minutes trying to reconnect
and publish. Get your act together, SBC! This happened before the
hurricane. In good weather.

Back in the day, my Hillbilly Dad worked for Southwestern Bell.
That was before they were declared a monopoly and had to break
up into a jillion Baby Bells. The service was better back then, in my
opinion. It wasn't broke, and when they fixed it (meaning the giant
phone company) we ended up with higher bills and poorer service.
Bah, humbug.

Student Question of the Day
"Do you take this desk to the other building with you?" This is a
large wooden desk, about 4 feet x 2.5 feet. Lay off the crack, girlie!
"Uh, yes. I hoist it onto my shoulder, carry it down 2 flights of stairs,
heave it onto the roof of my SUV, haul it home with me, then the

next morning I lug it into the high school building, use it for 3 hours,
have my strongest boys carry it back to the SUV, then schlepp it
back up the stairs just in time for your class." And to think you just
asked a couple days ago: "Do teachers ever have to do any work?"

Horn Tooting
#1 son is not exactly a wallflower. He wants to be in the Tech Club,
which appears to meet after school one day a week, and might
get to work on computer equipment in the elementary building. It
is only open to 4th and 5th graders. He just started 5th. To apply,
each student must have a letter of recommendation from a parent
or a teacher.

Apparently, I am not good enough, even though I am a parent and
a teacher. He has a glowing letter from the elementary librarian,
who seems to be one of the main people in charge of all things tech
in that building. But was this good enough for my son? Noooo!
Nothing would do but he had to ask the Superintendent of Schools
for a recommendation for 5th grade Tech Club.

I tried to discourage him. "You already have a great recommendation.
You only need one. He is a busy man. You can't just walk in and talk
to him. You have to make an appointment with his secretary." Next
thing I know, I'm putting #2 son into the hot hot hot SUV and turn
around and see that #1 has gone into the Superintendent building.
I went in to find him chatting with one of the secretaries, who told
him that someone was already in the office, but she would give Mr.
Superintendent his message. #1 reminded her "I need it by 3:00 pm
Friday." Man....that kid has guts!

And he fixed my printing problem at the high school that the techies
there had messed up last week. From a company we contract our
computer stuff to. The guy in charge told #1 last year..."I can't wait
until you're old enough to come work for us." To which #1 replied,
"I will be your competition." Guts, I tell you!


  • At 8:40 PM, Blogger Redneck Diva said…

    When it rains here at the Diva Ranch we get so much static in the phone lines it's ridiculous. Here lately it's been awful!! Several times the caller and I both have just given up - or at least I think the caller gave up, too. I couldn't hear them.

    #1 Son - He is one cool kid.

  • At 9:51 PM, Blogger deadpanann said…

    How do people react to him? He scares me a little. #1 son, that is. Have you ever watched Pinky and the Brain?

    "We're Pinky and the Brain! We're Pinky and the Brain! One is a genius. The other one's insane... What're we going to do today, Brain? The same thing we do every day, Pinky. Try to take over the worlllldd muwahahahah!"

  • At 9:56 PM, Blogger Redneck Diva said…

    Ann - I used to have an online friend that would always IM me with the same question to start a conversation - Pinky, are you thinking what I'm thinking?

    I'd always come back with something off the wall like "Yeah, Brain, but I'm just not sure how to get the lifesavers UP my nose!" or "Yeah, Brain, but the squirrels simply don't WANT to wear the tutus!"

    Those were good times. Wonder where he is now...I must go Google him.

    Oh hey there Hillbilly Mom - just using your comments section to talk to Ann. Don't mind me.


  • At 10:41 PM, Blogger Hillbilly Mom said…

    At least someone can use it. SBC STILL tells me nothing is wrong, but they can send someone out to see if THEY hear static on the line. Duh! I know I have no life, but I am not calling you people for FUN!

    Miss Ann,
    #1 used to love that show. He said he was the Brain, and his little brother was "insane." The kids in his class call him Jimmy Neutron. He aspires to have "Jimmy Neutron Hair" every time they have "crazy hair day" at school.

  • At 6:40 PM, Blogger Rebecca said…

    Hi Hillbilly Mom,
    I suggest you convince #1 Son to ditch computers, and start up a phone company instead.

  • At 12:13 AM, Blogger Hillbilly Mom said…

    If it's electronic, he wants to master it. He sets up our voice mail thingies and tells us how to work these new-fangled inventions. He took his allowance money to buy his own phone when he was 9. He bought a set with two phones--one for upstairs and one for downstairs. He pages me on them like I am his secretary. He has a bad habit of putting people on speaker phone and not telling them.


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