Redneck Review

Monday, July 04, 2005

It Really IS All About ME

This is one of the Mysteries of My Universe, but there wasn't room
for it. So it gets its own post. Put on your steel-toed boots, cause
we're goin' for a ride, and I don't want to run over any toes. I am
about to violate the first rule of blog ettiquette: Don't talk about
blog ettiquette. It is uncharacteristic of me to complain (to those
of you who know me personally: Pick yourself up off the floor and
reattach your a$$), but I can not help myself.

Why are some people, as my Hillbilly Mama would say, "Just not

Several weeks ago, I was reading one of my daily blogs, and they
were discussing a topic I had posted on a while back. It was very
general, and I added my opinion to the comments. There were
already comments in the teens or twenties, and I did not feel like I
was intruding on any personal discussion. But apparently I had
crashed the popular kids' party, because when I went there the next
day, one of them had posted a kind of snotty comment ridiculing
my redneck lifestyle, and the blog owner joined in. So you know
what? I can get that treatment in real life, and don't need it from the
blog world. So I haven't been back, and removed it from my links.
If you don't want to play nice with me, I'll take my blog and go home.
Oh, I see them around the blogosphere, posting comments in other
places, pretending to be Nicey McNicerton, but I know they're not.

I will not say who it is, because my Hillbilly Mama taught me that
if you can't say anything nice, just put it in your blog. So I did, and
I brought all of you back to 7th grade with me, because "childish"
is my middle name. I am as bad as those crybabies on Survivor
and Big Brother, whining because somebody lied to them. Imagine
the nerve of some people, putting their own opinions in their own

Now I'm sure you are thinking: But Hillbilly Mom, aren't you
being not nice by criticizing them in your blog? Yep. They can
do whatever they want in their blogs, and if I don't like it I don't
have to read it. So I won't. I played nice for weeks, and didn't
bring it up until this stuff really started griping my gizzard. Now
that it's out, I feel better.

I can say what I want, because here it is all about me, you know?
I am backing my large GMME MEkon down my driveway at
#1 ME Avenue, cruising up to the Main Street of MEville,
listening to K-ME on the radio, pulling into Sonic for a large
cherry diet ME, with a side order of cheese-ME and as a
special treat in the bag, a peppermMEnt, then hanging a left
to get on ME Boulevard, swinging past the ME factory where
they make plaques of my inspirational sayings such as "People
Piss ME Off," down past the fields of soyMEans, and up the
on-ramp to the MEway that is my life, taking all of you along
for the ride. Oh, enough about ME already. Rant over.


  • At 9:32 AM, Blogger Rebecca said…

    HI Hillbilly Mom,
    Can you let us know the name of this blog, I feel there is some blogcrashing coming their way.

  • At 10:19 AM, Blogger Alexandrialeigh said…

    Well, I've figured out the blog, but can't find the offending post -- and I wanted to add my own two cents!

    And it looks like Bec has volunteered, too...Ms. H. Mom, please share the offender with us so that we may police the blogosphere promptly. This is a place of free expression--let's keep it from dissolving into a bunch of bitchy cliques, eh?

  • At 10:36 AM, Blogger Rebecca said…

    It doesn't worry me where the offending post is in the blog, I'll just complain about anything there. Come on Hillbilly Mom, I have some venting to do!

  • At 10:58 AM, Blogger Hillbilly Mom said…

    "I'll never teeelllll." Didn't that line creep you out when anorexic bleached blond Brittany Murphy said it in Don't Say a Word?

    I won't say who it was, but if you think you have it figured out, Alexandrialeigh, think again, because I recently removed 4 links: the one who got snarky with me, one who is going out of business, one who doesn't update enough for me, and one that I'm just really not that into anymore. You might have guessed it, though.

    Even if you guess it, I still won't tell, because what good could come of that? I feel better already for venting about it. I don't need no hillbilly feudin' in the blogosphere--I have one of those going on at work--where I will be returning in approximately 42 days and 21 hours (but who's counting).

    Thanks for sticking up for me!

  • At 2:47 PM, Blogger Melina said…

    Sorry they made fun of you...I think I was posting on that blog that day too. Damn kids.

  • At 11:02 PM, Blogger Rachel Croucher said…

    I think it's amusing when people berate hillbillies, as though such a lifestyle were inferior... who has more fun? Having grown up in the country myself I'm damn proud of my hillbilly roots and would say most of the friendships from my childhood were more honest than some of the friendships I made since moving to the city... and my dear, it is all about YOU:-)

  • At 11:37 PM, Blogger deadpanann said…

    Right on HBMomma!

    I have no idea what was said since I didn't see it but it's unfortunate that people would get their panties in a wad and stoop low enough to make fun of you for being a hillbilly when you are a self-proclaimed hillbilly and are proud enough of your hillbilly-isms to devote a freakin' blog to it. Besides, your level of hillbilliness is rather mild, and very tolerable. But hey, I'm half redneck and one-fourth hillbilly--with white trash roots underneath-- so maybe I can't be objective.

    If people thought your hillbilly-isms were worthy of hillbilly bashing, I can hardly wait to hear the response to the pictures of my mom's back yard.

  • At 10:20 PM, Blogger Redneck Diva said…

    You just don't redneck/hillbilly bash unless you are one yourself. And then it's a very tongue-in-cheek thing anyway. I'm sorry they were hateful. There's just no excuse for that. I've never understood why people have to be snarky and rude and downright MEAN out here in BlogLand. Chin up, dear. "He who angers you, controls you."


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